The Wizard of Loneliness
Fresh underground hip-hop from New York's Upgrade
By revisiting the dark, introspective themes of Chemical Imbalance with a sharper focus and a greater sense of acceptance, Upgrade’s Wizard of Loneliness marks a striking evolution in his catalog. The album sees the New York-turned-Vegas-based MC refining his raw, DIY aesthetic while embracing an unfiltered emotional honesty, resulting in an experience that is both immersive and deeply personal. Also, he makes sick beats.
Read on for more about the latest from this underground MC.
The Wizard’s Themes
The title Wizard of Loneliness—drawn from a moment in Nathan for You, a show sampled throughout the record—perfectly encapsulates Upgrade’s headspace. “I could have a lot of friends and family but still feel lonely and out of place, but still be a wizard at my craft,” he explains. This tension between isolation and mastery plays out across the album, where themes of anxiety, disillusionment, and self-acceptance are explored with a blunt, almost matter-of-fact perspective. Tracks like “Self Help Guru” or “Bad Luck” don’t just dwell in these struggles; they confront them head-on with a resigned, “it is what it is” attitude.
Upgrade’s influences also seep into the album’s DNA. A fan of bleak, uncompromising films like Funny Games, Martyrs, and Requiem for a Dream, he gravitates toward stories that don’t offer neat resolutions. That philosophy informs his writing—there are no forced happy endings here. Instead, Wizard of Loneliness is about acknowledging life’s struggles, accepting what’s out of one’s control, and moving forward despite it all. “I can either dwell on the time wasted, or accept my brain is fucked and do the best I can,” he says. That sentiment is embedded in every line of the album.
Lyrically, Upgrade delivers some of his sharpest writing to date. His flow feels more controlled yet more emotionally raw, oscillating between rapid-fire internal rhymes and spoken-word-like reflections.
The Wizard of Production
Sonically, Wizard of Loneliness expands upon the lo-fi, moody textures of Chemical Imbalance, pushing them into more atmospheric and unsettling terrain. The beats aren’t just backdrops; they feel like living, breathing entities that interact with Upgrade’s verses. This process isn’t calculated—he describes his beat-making as pure experimentation, often disregarding traditional music theory in favor of what simply feels right.
“It’s just days and days and days of experimenting,” he said. “I don’t have any set rules to making beats. People who are into music theory would probably rip their hair out seeing the way I try to get things in key!” That instinctual approach results in production that feels warped and off-kilter, yet undeniably compelling. Tracks like “Late to the Party” highlight his ability to weave complex rhythms into his storytelling, while “Thanks, I Guess” brings in subtle melodic flourishes that add moments of unexpected beauty.
Recording this project came with its own challenges. Living in a house with poor soundproofing, Upgrade often had to improvise—sometimes even recording in homes where he was dog-sitting. “Maybe if you listen carefully you can hear some light barking in some tracks,” he jokes. This resourceful, DIY approach reinforces the rawness of the record, where imperfections become part of the album’s fabric rather than flaws to be polished away. “Any beat I use, I love,” he said laughing.
The Wizard’s Tracks
Key to the album’s central theme, the opening track “Acceptance” is a haunting meditation on dissociation. It’s a song that lingers long after it ends, much like the album itself. “I wanted to really drive the theme of acceptance here,” Upgrade said of the album overall, “whether it’s letting things go or just straight up pointing out the bullshit and not being afraid to say it with an ‘it is what it is’ mindset.”
Another track offers an important personal accomplishment: “I just wanted to highlight the second verse of ‘Self Help Guru,’ because it’s something I always wanted to write about but just couldn’t get out.”
A song about private struggles, mental health, and the commercialization of self-improvement, “Self Help Guru” is a personal reflection and commentary on a larger issue. There’s a sense of self-doubt, a drive to succeed for his family, and a frustration with the way creative passions can feel exhausting or unrecognized. Lines like “know I haven’t made it til I pay my mother’s bills” and “feel I’m crashing out on every passion that I build” highlight this internal conflict between ambition and burnout.
The track quickly shifts towards a sharp critique of self-help gurus. The artist calls out the exploitative nature of the self-help industry, suggesting that these figures profit off people’s desperation while offering generic, often unrealistic advice. Lines like “Tony Robbins doesn’t know my problems / and Gary Vee he doesn’t care for me” emphasize the disconnect between real personal struggles and the commodified nature of self-improvement.
The song also critiques the toxic positivity that self-help culture often promotes, dismissing real mental health issues with superficial solutions. The artist rejects the notion that simply following a formula or motivational quotes can fix deep-seated struggles, ending with a powerful sentiment: “Motherfucker, I just need to be alone.”
“I was very happy to put it into words where I feel like it made sense and you can see my view. It’s not about hating on any self help gurus or self help books but just a different view on it.”
"Bed Rot" is a track that resonates with anyone who has ever found themselves stuck in a cycle of procrastination, avoidance, and doom-scrolling. With tight, hypnotic beats, the song captures the feeling of being physically drained yet mentally overstimulated, lost in an endless scroll of distractions while avoiding the weight of reality. The production mirrors this mood, blending mellow rhythms with an underlying tension that reflects the frustration of wanting to break free but lacking the energy to do so.
Similarly, "Bad Luck" strikes a chord with anyone who has ever felt like life keeps throwing obstacles in their way. The song embodies the exhaustion of trying to move forward when nothing seems to go right, tapping into the universal feeling of being stuck in a losing streak. The rich instrumentation—layered with haunting piano melodies and swelling strings—adds an emotional depth that amplifies the weight of the lyrics. The melancholic tones of the piano set a reflective mood, while the strings bring a cinematic intensity, emphasizing the song’s themes of frustration, resignation, and perseverance in the face of adversity.
Album closer "Thanks, I Guess" carries a vintage vibe that feels both nostalgic and reflective, calling to mind classics like The Notorious B.I.G.’s "Juicy" and MF DOOM’s "Doomsday." The track embraces a warm, soulful mood, a sharp contrast to the song's theme of putting artistic integrity before success. Listening closely, you can hear echoes of Upgrade accepting his commercial status in “Self Help Guru” as he thanks his fans for listening, regardless of how few or how many there are. “Thanks, I Guess” packs a ton of emotion into 2:52 without being contrived or unlistenable.
Struggle, Acceptance, and Moving Forward
At its core, Wizard of Loneliness isn’t just about sadness or struggle—it’s about the difficult, ongoing process of acceptance. The album doesn’t wallow in despair; it acknowledges it, shrugs, and moves forward. “I don’t ever want to feel comfortable when I’m making music,” Upgrade says, and that discomfort is precisely what makes this record so gripping.
Lyrically, Upgrade lays everything bare—his fears, his frustrations, and his unfiltered thoughts about success, self-worth, and the world around him. Tracks like “Self Help Guru” take aim at the exploitative nature of self-improvement culture, while “Bed Rot” captures the all-too-relatable cycle of procrastination and doom scrolling. There’s an honesty here that refuses to sugarcoat the struggle, but at the same time, Wizard of Loneliness isn’t hopeless. It’s searching, evolving, and pushing forward, even when the path is unclear.
By embracing both his limitations and his strengths, Upgrade has crafted an album that demands attention, not just as an artistic statement, but as a testament to the resilience it takes to keep going. Wizard of Loneliness doesn’t promise an easy way out, but it does something even more powerful: acceptance.
Meet The Wizard
Upgrade is a rapper from upstate New York, known for his introspective lyrics, intricate wordplay, and unique blend of hip-hop styles. Over the past decade, he has shared stages with notable artists such as Mac Miller and Styles P as well as underground artists like Weerd Science (Coheed and Cambria drummer Josh Eppard’s hiphop project) and Ceschi Ramos, earning respect for his energetic performances and thought-provoking storytelling.
From the beginning, Upgrade has been open about his struggles with anxiety and panic attacks, experiences that have deeply influenced his music. His 2015 full-length debut, Chemical Imbalance: Another Dose, reflects this, offering listeners an unfiltered look into his personal battles.
The album set the stage for his ongoing evolution as an artist, solidifying his reputation for blending raw emotion with sharp lyricism.
Since Chemical Imbalance, Upgrade has proven himself to be a prolific force in independent hip-hop. He has released nine full-length albums, along with numerous singles, collaborations, and one-off projects that showcase his versatility. Whether delivering hard-hitting bars, introspective storytelling, or offbeat humor, Upgrade consistently pushes his creative boundaries.
The Wizard of Loneliness continues to build on his strong foundation, bringing listeners deeper into his world while expanding his sonic palette. From deeply personal narratives to sharp social observations, Upgrade remains a wizard with words, crafting music that resonates long after the beat fades.
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So I only listened to a bit of the new album today, but I’d never heard of this dude before, and I’m always looking for solid underground hip hop. Decided to start with Chemical Imbalance and holy shit. Had me hooked by a minute into the opening track. Excited to continue my deep dive. Thanks for posting this on here, what a find!